I have attended church all my life. Attendance was mandatory in my growing up years, twice on Sunday and once in the middle of the week. When I married, my husband became a preacher. Going to church was on my “to do” list. Then I became a single parent, so I mandated church attendance just as I had been taught. When I remarried, we attended together. It was just the right thing to do. After 70 years, I had never analyzed why I went to church.
My husband passed away; my children were grown and gone. I wrote in my journal, “Why do I go to church?”
I had become dissatisfied with the church I traveled to each Sunday. It seemed to be about entertainment and numbers. It was time to evaluate my reasons for church attendance. I was amazed at the words that flowed onto the paper that day. Even though it was a large church, (or maybe because it was a large church), I had few close friends there. I knew the names of many people, but it was just surface “How are you?” and “Fine” conversations. I treasured the limited close friendships.
But was that why I attended church?
It certainly wasn’t the music, so loud that many used earplugs. My answer to why I attended Sunday after Sunday was the pastor and Word that he preached. Weekly he helped me dig deeper in my walk with Christ. That was of great importance to me. If I didn’t go there, I would truly miss that. But I felt like church was supposed to be a community of believers. Many seemed to be marking it off their “to do” list as I had done for years. I longed for more than just a Sunday gathering.
I stopped going to church. For me, that was monumental.
Ten months went by as I prayed, pondered and analyzed my situation. The Bible talks about the early church. They didn’t even have a building, meeting in various homes. But it was clear “church” was important. I asked God to help me know my intended church destination. I desired connection with believers. It seemed I might find that in a smaller church. I drove around town and sat in parking lots of different churches, most of whom I had never heard of.
I felt compelled to return to one certain parking lot several times. I sat in the car and asked God, “Is this the one?”
One year ago today, I walked through the door of that church. Person after person greeted me warmly. The sermon was Bible based with strong points for a Christian walk. The next Sunday, many greeted me by name. I was impressed. Another wonderful sermon. I was just beginning to connect names with faces when COVID hit. But they still reached out to me by text and phone. We became friends on Facebook. The pastor has been in my home more than once, and I’ve been in his.
Church is so much more than just driving to a building, putting in an hour or two and going home. We are the church. During this time of uncertainty and fear, our world needs the church to truly be the “church”. There are varied ways to do that. I’ve chosen some methods for me. I long to be used of God, even though I am basically confined to my home.
I know why I go to church. Do you?
“And let us not neglect our meeting together, as some people do, but encourage one another…” Hebrews 10:25 (NLT)
That was the church we ended up at in Hawaii. All churches since are judged by that wonderful, small, caring community of believers that were living what they taught. Thank you for sharing. Have a wonderful New Year!
Thanks so much for your comments. There are some great churches. Happy New Year!
This was very good, Joy, and thought provoking for me. A medium sized church that uses biblical instruction and where you can truly become part of a “church family” seems to hit all the right notes.
That sounds about right. I struggled at first with the smallness. Bad memories from childhood. But the people are so warm and caring, I’ve grown to love it. Thanks for commenting.